I could see the same thing being written by an American weeb. Degeneracy truly is international

Japanese twitter was at one point a fucking zoo that made American degeneracy look like a church; it may still be. Some hits:

Ok I changed my mind. Clearly two nukes weren't enough

If two nukes made them like this in the first place, I'd be worried what more would do.

Some of this is totally on Google Translate.

In the second picture, the text is
飯テロ見ながら、寝るよ

飯テロ is not "terrorist attacks". 飯 is food, テロ is terrorism, together they form a slang word that is used when someone posts pictures of delicious food while you are hungry.

So, this person was just going to watch food porn while lying in bed, but... Yea, translation error.

I honestly like the last one, quite ingenious to lower a bit the stress...

The toilet rim piss isnt anywhere near as bad as the others, its happened to me before, thats why i piss standing.

came here to say this. lightweight compared to other niches I've witnessed.

I will die if I can't masturbate two times a day

-- Delutaya

Look around you Miika. What do you SEE ?

Now I know why most Japanese are Xenophobe.

Can't relate, my dick touches the water if I don't pull some out

That was geniuenly funny and you ruined it. Give me back my absurdist comedy.

In the US the water level in the toilets is way too high, maybe that is why.
I've never had this happen here in Europe, but when I visited the US years ago for a week it happened to me.

We don't have to inspect our feces for parasites, so it can just plop into water. I'm sorry to hear that you can't say the same.

I never had to do that, I don't know why I would have to.

We do have some old toilets that would make that possible and the one in my house sadly is one of them.

The new toilets also let the poop fall into the water directly, they just aren't filled with water to the top, it is enough to have a small pool of water at the bottom.

My joke was that people still use Flachspüler for their originally-intended purpose in the late 19th Century, which was to check their stool for pork-borne parasites.
American toilets aren't filled to the top, only about ⅓ of the total volume is water. The idea is to have enough water to keep fecal matter completely submerged, to cut down on odor and to prevent skidmarks. However, older toilets are indeed wasteful, using about 14.25L of water per flush. The law was changed in 1994 to limit newly-manufactured toilets to 6L per flush, but the first generation of "low-flow" toilets were so ineffective that consumers simply refused to buy them, and most homes have a toilet made in 1993 or before. Only in the last ~10 years have modern "high efficiency" toilets taken root, which let you choose either a 3L or 4L flush. Those, too, are still designed so there's plenty of water to cover stool.

Ultimately, the most pressing issue with toilets is not the water height, it's that each one should also have a bidet, but too few actually do. Personally, I'd like one of those Japanese toilets that has an integrated heated bidet and plays music.